Rookie traveller

I'm in Brazil for a weeklong meeting - I arrived today in Sao Paulo expecting chaos because of the torrential rains that have already killed so many, but everything was smooth sailing.  We got picked up at the airport on time, and were whisked an hour into the countryside, where we are staying at the Bourbon Spa Resort.  Sounds fancy, but I've had to struggle to get my internet connection working.  Wireless is slow as molasses, so I'm having to use a LAN cable.  A what?  Yes, they still have those, youngling - wires that physically tether you to a specific location.  Cruel and unusual punishment, that is.

Also, despite the grand-sounding name of the hotel, the place is guilty of one of my pet peeves - no iron in the room.  I don't get it.  I mean, I know I'm a little anal and like to iron my clothes in the morning, but how can a hotel - a large, resort-style hotel with attached convention center which attracts business travelers from all over the world - not have in-room irons?  What's more, the front desk didn't keep irons either.  What the h#$%!  Are South Americans the world's greatest luggage-packers?  Do their clothes simply not crease?  I understand when a small, family-owned inn in a quaint European town, keeps irons only at the front desk because there is a clear fire and electrical hazard to keeping irons in guest rooms, but I'm staying at quite a modern facility.  I've had to spring for expensive ironing service for half of my wardrobe, the other half of which I will simply wear wrinkled.  Trust me, though - I'll be keeping an eagle-eye out for folds on the clothes of the other meeting attendees.  Because if I don't find any, they know something this experienced traveler does not.