How I did my part for the Turkish economy

Saeeda came to Turkey prepared with a list of items she wanted to purchase before we left. Evil-eye charms that are so prevalent here, some Turkish tea, a calligraphic wall hanging, and if possible, a small Turkish carpet.  In all our international trips, shopping has been an organic experience. We will inevitably find ourselves in a marketplace where something will catch our eye, or we will learn of a trinket that we feel defines the country we are touring, and we will make the purchase. Rarely have we set aside time dedicated to the pursuit of shopping for something specific.

This time around, though, things were a little different. As we have continued to spend time in Istanbul, Saeeda has fallen in love with the beautiful rugs that we see in all the stores that we pass. At the same time, we’ve realized that we don’t really know much about rug buying, especially since the nice carpets that we do own were wedding gifts. We confessed this naivete to our hotel concierge, who immediately recommended what he professed would be a great carpet-buying experience.  A friend of his worked at a genuine antique store that specialized in carpets, and this store was run by a family that had been in the business for three generations.

Yeah, ok, nice story, I thought to myself. It’ll probably still be the same song and dance these things are everywhere, and going with a “friend” of his that just happened to work at a carpet store was probably not going to lead to anything. Still, it would be an opportunity for us to educate ourselves before perhaps buying at a different store, and it would be a chance to avoid the Grand Bazaar area – that infamous, notorious tourist-trap that sits not far from the Blue Mosque and has been a merchant hub for centuries. Shopping there for a rug would be just asking to be fleeced. 

I told the concierge that we’d try to go to his friend’s store in the evening after we were done with our sightseeing for the day.  I was immediately reminded of this commitment upon our return to the hotel that evening.

“Sir, your car is ready,” said the concierge when he spotted us.

Car? What car? I learned that the carpet store where the concierge's friend worked had offered to pick us up.

“Ok, give us ten minutes,” I requested. We quickly washed up, came down, and walked outside to a waiting, well-appointed Mercedes.

Alright, I thought to myself. You’re hitting us with the Reciprocity Principle. Offer us a service that is, on the face of it, purely a gesture of goodwill, but will later make us feel like we need to reciprocate and make a purchase. Please, I thought to myself, you’re not dealing with an amateur here.

Still, the ride was smooth, and the modern car contrasted nicely with the ancient buildings we passed. Just make sure they give you a ride back if you don’t make a purchase, I reminded myself.

Our destination was tucked away in a quiet corner of the old city in Sultanahmet. A few cafes dotted the streets, and a side door, labeled simply "Antiques" led down into the store. A winding stairway suddenly opened up to an extremely large space that looked like it was part of a beautiful, old building basement. There were archways leading deeper into the space, and sandstone brick decorated with repeating, fading patterns decorated the ceiling. And there were carpets everywhere.

We were greeted by a lady who introduced herself as our concierge’s friend. She smiled at Nuha, and immediately picked her up to start playing with her. No sooner had she done so, than a smartly dressed, middle-aged gentleman appeared at the foot of the stairs, shook hands with us, and introduced himself as Salman, the store owner.

What followed was one of the most amazing sales jobs I have been subjected to, and despite my ability to recognize what was happening, I was unable to resist. Salman first gave us a tour of the building basement that we were standing in, discussing the history of the space that itself stretched centuries into the past. He sat us down beside a loom, and explained in detail the process by which a carpet is put together, taking the time to let us hold dyed yarn, pluck at the loom, and play with the texture of the partially woven carpet on the loom. A half hour later, he had us take a seat on comfortable cushions against a wall, at which point he started to educate us on the history of carpets, and their place in Turkish culture. Saeeda and I were captivated – Salman knew his subject well, and something about learning about carpets from someone who was third-generation, while sitting in a ancient space surrounded by beautiful rugs was mesmerizing. Tea appeared beside us magically as we continued to learn from Salman. Our daughter was nowhere to be seen, but we could hear peels of laughter emanating from the corners of the store as the concierge’s friend continued to play with her.

These guys are good, I thought. Nuha has been removed as a distraction, and Salman is doing a great sales job.

It was then that a muscled helper appeared bearing silk rugs. The large open floor space in front of us was empty, but this helper quickly began to fill it with a dazzling array of the most spectacular silk rugs. I had no doubt that this gentleman’s physique was due in no small part to the weight of these rugs that he carried around effortlessly. He would approach us and all of a sudden shake out a rug in the air. The rug would fall towards the floor as it opened and rolled towards us, landing at our feet as Salman switched conversation to discuss the new rug, telling us about the motifs, symbolism, source, and heritage of the rug. It was all a well choreographed dance.

An hour into our visit, the topic of price finally came up. I realized that I had to start moving this process along, as Salman showed no signs of slowing down. My blunt question, tactless, though it was, helped start the real buying process. When Salman mentioned the prices of the rugs splayed open before us, I had to do everything in my power to ensure that I did not bring up the tea I had been drinking. I will not name the number here, but suffice it to say, it was well beyond our reach. I felt Saeeda shift a little, and knew that she was working hard not to let things show on her face as well.

Now exercising more tact, I crafted the most subtle way of informing Salman that we needed to see something cheaper. I started by asking about other materials used to make carpets, and of carpets that came from other regions of Turkey. A smart salesman, Salman picked up on this, and began to show us carpets that were progressively lower in price, but which came with a simultaneous decrease in quality. It was also at this point that I knew I was going to make a purchase at this store. Don’t ask me to explain – the dynamics of the entire experience until that point had been such that it would have been impossible to walk out without making a purchase. My only goal was not to be goaded by the extremely high anchor that Salman had set.

So I did the untactful, and mentioned our budget to Salman. Ever obliging, he said he could help, and started showing us yet more rugs. As the floor space piled thick with carpets that Salman’s helper continued to bring, I realized that despite my stated budget, the rugs that Salman was showing us remained well above the number I had told him. Nicely done, I thought. Salman was using my number not as a ceiling, but as a starting floor for everything that he was showing me.

But the carpets were just … so … beautiful! I had never made a snap purchase of this magnitude, but nothing about the experience was high-pressure, nor did I feel at any point that I was being led on as the dumb tourist that could be taken advantage of. Salman was incredibly knowledgeable, and his staff amazingly friendly, a point driven home when Nuha came squealing around a corner, pecked us on the cheek and ran off with her store friends again. Man this was going to be hard, I thought.

In the end, despite my initial intention to use this simply as an educational experience, I made a purchase, and one that I feel will make a beautiful addition to our home. This was not a store where you bargained in price – I had picked up on this early, and this was something the concierge had also mentioned earlier in the day at the hotel. If you want to bargain, he had said, go to the Grand Bazaar. My friend is a wholesaler, and does business the right way, he had said.

Regardless, I spent way more than I had ever budgeted for this. Again, I will not mention numbers, but will tell you that I paid 500% more than the price I had initially told Saeeda I would shell out when we walked into that store. I had plenty of time to contemplate this as I signed all the paperwork, and when Salman personally drove us back to our hotel (in another Mercedes).

Sometimes it’s ok to be taken on a sales ride, especially if things are handled in a polite and entertaining manner. Or at least, that’s how I'm justifying what happened.

Topkapi

Palace of the Sultans and a seat of Ottoman power for hundreds of years, Topkapi palace promised to be a great place to soak up some history and immerse ourselves in stories of palace intrigue. It did not disappoint in either respect. Laid out over a spacious strip of land that looks out over the Bosphorous, Topkapi palace reminded me a lot of the Forbidden City in Beijing. The parallels were eery - no commoners were allowed past the first courtyard, both were home to courtesans that spent their entire lives without setting foot outside the palace walls, and both are stunning in architecture and scope.

Out of all the areas, I found the Harem to be one of the most fascinating (but then, what guy wouldn’t?) A variation of the Arabic word “Haram”, meaning forbidden, the Topkapi harem was massive, and at one time housed 500 of the sultan’s concubines. But to me the Harem buildings could only be described as a gilded cage – amazingly beautiful in the craftsmanship of its many residences and gatehouses, but completely enclosed and secluded from the rest of the already secretive palace. Women brought here could spend their entire lives and not see the Sultan once, and had to rely on intrigue and scheming to make it up the pecking order. Murders were not out of the question, and poisonings were commonplace. A dangerous place, indeed.

The Treasury was equally spectacular, but not for its architecture. Here, the jewels and finery on display were breathtaking. 86 carat diamonds, thrones inlaid with gold, emerald and ruby encrusted daggers – all bore testament to not only the craftsmanship and creativity of the Ottomans, but also of their ability to bring home impressive treasures from far-flung conflicts. Three vast rooms, with case upon case eventually wore us down – there’s only so much glitter one can take before depression sets in.

Finally, the rooms dedicated to religious relics were also a great stop. Among artifacts from Mecca and Medina lay a display that I found inspiring – swords of all four caliphs, surrounding that of the Prophet Muhammad’s. As a child, I grew up hearing stories of the incredible persecution these men had faced, and of how they had fought back with faith and conviction. To see the swords they used, each a reflection of their personality, was special. Omar’s and Ali’s were massive broadswords, whereas Abu Bakr’s and Uthman’s were smaller, more elegant. The Prophet’s? Simple.

Although a big part of me wanted to believe that all articles in the Religious Relics museum were real, at least two of them engendered skepticism. In one room, I had a tough time believing that I was looking at the actual wooden staff of Prophet Moses, perhaps in part due to the cheesy animation in the background that keep showing the parting of the Red Sea. And I was similarly skeptical of the “cooking pot of Abraham,” which looked suspiciously like any other metallic cooking vessel I had ever seen – except this one claimed to be millennia old and claimed a credible chain of possession that somehow had been traced back to its original owner.

But then, if those artifacts were not real, what about the imprint of the Prophet’s foot? And pieces of the Prophet’s beard (also on display)? And those swords I found so inspiring? I guess in the end the faithful choose to impart authenticity to their religious artifacts in defiance of logic, but is that so bad? Science will not convince these individuals otherwise, so let them believe in the authenticity of their religious relics, as long as these are used to magnify the positive of each faith. As for me, I think I’ll believe in the Swords, and ignore the Staff of Moses and the Cooking Pot of Abraham. Probably not consistent, but as I said, so what?

Harems, treasures, and relics. The all-day visit to Topkapi was exhausting, but was a complete experience that was absolutely worth it.

No longer hip

I’m fortunate that I've made friends from all over the world, including Turkey. It's been these friends that I have relied on heavily for advice on things to see and do while in Istanbul, as well as to find out about “insider” restaurants away from the tourist hordes. Now that we're here in Istanbul, we hit up one of the recommendations for dinner – a great place with great food and great views. But the moment this recommended eatery we knew something was wrong.

The maitre d’ looked at us with obvious skepticism. “Do you have a reservation?” she asked. Her tone was layered with barely hidden incredulity.

“Yes,” I said. “Our hotel concierge had called ahead, and had even asked if it was ok to bring a two year old.”

The maitre d’ laughed – a mirthless, you-must-be-kidding-me laugh. “I don’t think so. We don’t allow children in our restaurant.”

Hmm, ok. Obviously there had been miscommunication somewhere along the way. I peeked into the restaurant, and realized that I should probably not be too concerned about this person’s attitude. Inside, the trendy restaurant was filled with young people, decked out in designer clothes. Lounge music was playing, lighting was dim and the china looked fine. Not a place for a loud two year old.

Saeeda sensed the dilemma as well, and half turned to leave – she’d rather not deal with the stress of dinner in a place like this. However, Saeeda's movement may have made the maitre d’ think that she may be offending us, because as Saeeda headed to the door the maitre d' softened her tone somewhat.

“Ok, don’t worry. I have a table in the back." Then the following: "Is your baby a good baby?”

Good baby? What the hell sort of a question was that? Was her baby a good baby? What was a good baby? Was she implying I had a bad baby? So many questions, but I bit my tongue. The stubborn mule in me prevented me from walking away with Saeeda, and instead I agreed to be seated. We'd show her.

Inevitably, we were seated in a corner of a well appointed room, away from almost every other diner who was enjoying their food with great views of the Bosphorous. From the point our butts touched down on our seats, we began a stressful dance with Nuha, basically ensuring that she remained distracted and entertained, and never in a position to utter a peep. We made up our minds on what to order in record time, wolfed down whatever was put in front of us, skipped dessert, and were ready for the check within 30 minutes. I have to admit, I think Nuha picked up on our desperation too, because she remained beautifully well-behaved throughout the short meal. Whenever a neighboring diner would look our way, Nuha made to sure to look her cutest and coo back at them. She refrained from throwing silverware on the floor (which happens to be one of her favorite pastimes). At no point did she insist on running around the restaurant, and she ate what we put in front of her with gusto.

As we left a surprised maitre d’ behind us on our way out (how’s that for a good baby, you arrogant excuse for a restaurateur?) I realized that I would not only have to start filtering any advice I receive from friends who don’t have kids, but that hip eateries such as these were going to be off limits for a long, long time to come.

Oh well.

Humility

From Paris to Istanbul, and the transition could not have been starker. Although both are ancient cities, with layers of history just asking to be peeled away, Istanbul occupies a special place in Islamic history, and therefore makes it a city with which I, as a Muslim, can form a deeper connection. We arrived here late last night, and were not able to see anything on our drive into Sultanahmet, where we are staying and where some of the most important cultural sites are located. Our inability to see anything turned out to be for the better, because the true impact of the first two monuments we visited – the Ayasofya and Blue Mosque – was best appreciated in daylight the next day.

And what an impact! The Ayasofya simply took my breath away. The emperor Justinian, who commissioned its building around 537 CE, is said to have dropped to one knee when he first walked inside the completed structure, and to have proclaimed “Solomon, I have outdone thee!” It’s hard to argue with that emotion.

The external structure is not as special as the inside, which has the effect of falsely lowering your expectations of the interior – until, that is, you step over the threshold, and are faced with the soaring interior. The cavernous space is just beautiful, with domes ascending ever upwards, and unlike the typical European cathedral, the entire structure has an incredible feeling of lightness to it. It’s not easy to understand why that is initially, until you realize that there are no large support columns that split up the interior. Instead, the massive central dome of the Ayasofya is supported by smaller surrounding half-domes that create an ingenious distribution of weight. In addition, the use of windows around the base of the dome allow in beams of light that bounce around the entire building, creating a mystical quality. The net effect on a human being standing within that space is to make them feel … puny.

Although Aysofya was the largest cathedral in Christendom for a thousand years, it was eventually converted into a mosque after conquest of the surrounding lands by the Ottomans. The, beautiful, immense medallions hanging from the ceilings that bear calligraphic representations of Allah and Muhammad are testament to this part of the building’s past. I felt this picture captured the duality of the Ayasofia's past, with the two medallions I mention suspended below a mosaic of the Virgin Mary.

We spent over an hour inside, even though there were no special exhibits to soak up our time – just standing in that hall was enough.

Ripping ourselves away from the Ayasofya was hard, but made easier by the fact that across the main square lay the beautiful Blue Mosque, so called because of the thousands of blue Iznik tiles that adorn its interior. Unlike the Ayasofya, the Blue Mosque presents a striking image from the very beginning. The intent, which is clearly achieved, is of size, majesty, and splendor. All visitors can enter the mosque, as long as they are appropriately covered. However, unlike the other visitors, as Muslims we were allowed to enter the actual space for prayer. This was significant, as it provided a symbolic differentiation, and helped make me feel a little special. I mention this not to describe a sense of superiority of my faith over others, but to explain how hard it is in these times to openly profess one’s adherence to Islam. Being in an environment where my faith is celebrated meant much to me.

I’ve heard that the interior of the Blue Mosque is not considered as architecturally significant as that of the Ayasofya. From an artistic point of view, I guess I can understand that – Ayasofya’s dome, as I mention above, stuns you into silence, where the Blue Mosque provides a subtler and gentler welcome into its religious space. However, while I offered prayer there, my mind was far from considerations of architectural achievements. It was deep in contemplative thought, feeding off the trappings of the beautiful mimbar, the mihrab, and the calligraphy, all of which served to heighten the beauty of this amazing, ancient structure. It was easy to close my eyes and imagine the centuries of supplicants who had stood where I stood now, bowing their head in utter humility.

Humility - the Ayasofya and the Blue Mosque have a way of imposing that upon you.

The kind Parisian

The weather has not been very cooperative. Paris in the spring, unlike the saying, is very wet. However, the weather has been more than balanced by the good natured people of this city. Yes, you read that correct – all the Parisians that we’ve interacted with have been extremely helpful. This is in contrast to what we read in every guidebook we picked up, all of which wrote (with appropriate political correctness) that French can be perceived as rude, and that one should communicate in French first, because trying to blurt English at every opportunity is asking for trouble.

I’m not sure I buy into this whole haughty Parisian stereotype. There was one point this morning where Nuha started acting up and crying in our hotel lobby while we were trying to ask the concierge for directions. Before we knew it, one of the bellhops came over, took Nuha, grabbed apples from a complimentary fruit tray, and started to juggle for her. I’m not talking an amateurish three apples in the air at the same time – we’re talking Cirque du Soleil caliber theatrics. Not sure how many hotels back home have staff that receptive to a guest’s needs. You could argue that well trained hotel staff will look to help a guest at every turn, but I feel that the kindness we’ve been experiencing extends further. Every time I have tried speaking my halting French, I have been interrupted and spoken back to in English, without a trace of an attitude. In fact, I’ve felt that the person I’m speaking with has been more willing to speak in broken English to make it easier for me, rather than things having to be the other way around.

Communication in general has been very interesting. There have been a few occasions now where I have asked if the listener speaks English, and once told no, I am in turn asked if I speak Spanish. When I’ve said, we’ve suddenly discovered a language we’re both comfortable with. It makes for an interesting interaction – Pakistanis and French communicating in Spanish. Crazy world.

The Eiffel tower was really cool, literally and figuratively. The weather was brutal this morning, and reminded us of the blustery Chicago winter. We had purchased advance tickets, which meant shorter lines, but the French staff and tourists generous yet again, and offered us the opportunity to skip to the front of our line and get inside the visitor’s center where it would be warmer for Nuha.

One thing I’d like to highlight is that desis will be desis, no matter where you place them. The couple below was appropriately bundled for the day, wearing warm, puffy jackets, woolly hats, scarves and gloves. However, when it came time to taking a picture, they made their volunteer picture-taker wait 5 minutes as they slowly disrobed in the frigid weather, until the couple was down to something more stylish and appropriate for posterity.

Long lines

Day 2 in Paris, and how can one skip out on the Louvre? Quite easily actually, when it is cold and raining, and one has not planned far enough ahead to purchase tickets beforehand. Because if one does not do so, one is then faced with improbably long lines, as if free doughnuts were being handed out (what else would be worth such a line?)

Saeeda was disappointed, but honestly, I’m not an art expert, and I doubt that my two year old daughter is either. It would only be a matter of time before one of us (most likely me) would have melted down and gotten on Saeeda’s nerves. So instead we made the best of a wet situation and had some coffee and croissants under the shade of a tree, as tourists rushed around us to find some cover from the rain.

With French café au lait coursing through our vein, we set out to walk the neighborhoods of the Seine. It was only an hour or so later that the sun came out, drying things up quickly and generally lifting the mood. So we walked and walked, marveling at the sheer splendor and … age … of everything around us. It got to the point where I silently just started multiplying by 10 any estimate I had of how old something was. This looks about 100 years old to me – nope, sorry, try a 1,000. The 3,300 year old oblelisk in the Place de la Concorde (the largest square in Paris) really blew me away. How many man-made objects have you been around that are over 3 millennia old? I thought so.

The very wet evening was capped by a beautiful boat tour of the Seine, with great views of the Notre Dame cathedral and the Eiffel tower, which we hope to ascend tomorrow.

Paris

Ah, Paree. What can one say that has not already been said? Arrival was uneventful, and the bus to the hotel was simple to figure out. The hotel itself is great – a new Marriott property that reminds me of a W, although without the pretentious, clubby staff that makes you feel really old if you’re anything north of 21. Saeeda and I have been really fortunate in our travels in finding great new hotels that haven’t quite been discovered yet. For us, this has meant that our hotel points go far, and we stay in places that lack the tourist crowds.

Jet lag wasn’t bad, so we freshened up and headed out, hitting up the Arc de Triomphe, which was a 5 min. walk from our hotel, and then the Champs D’Elysees, where we had some overpriced (though still good) croissants and coffee, before heading into the Metro system. With the evening approaching, we decided to make Notre Dame cathedral our one and only stop for the day.

There is something to be said about structures that man erects to attempt to connect with the God of his religion. There is a sense of proportion, a sense of permanence, and a sense of beauty that all combine to humble the supplicant. And Notre Dame captures this essence with great power, despite being what I would call a moderately sized cathedral, and from what I'm told, nothing close to the magnitude of the Sistine Chapel. The interior was beautiful, and I was lucky enough to catch a mass in progress, which made the experience all the more authentic.

Afterwards, Saeeda and I walked around the Latin Quarter, struggling to control the stroller on cobblestoned streets, but enjoying the window shopping and the great variety of restaurants. We settled on a crepe place (for dinner – why not?), and dug into some delicious fare.

On the way home, we passed the Champs D’Elysees again, and spotted that mecca of luxury goods:

We also came across signs that Paris is full of culture, filled with a desire to learn more about little known parts of the world in order to increase a mutual understanding:

As well as signs that Paris has no taste in music, and insists on throwing lifelines to individuals who should have faded into a hazy memory a long, long time ago:

All in all, a great first day.